My name is Alex Ryder and I am seven years old. My parents died when I was five years old. I am an orphan. I have no friends, students at my school laugh at me. Am I that bad ?


I am now thirteen years old and I can say that I have grown tall and handsome. I still live in an orphanage, all the other kids there had been adopted but not me. I never understood why, they always say that they don’t want a sapphic child. I am still the bullied one.


I am fifteen years old and now I understand why I never got adopted, why I always felt something towards the same sex. But, no! I can’t tell anyone. I am still the freak. I don’t know what to do. I wish my parents were here to help me out, maybe….Just maybe, this is the reason that they left me.


At an age of fifteen, this was a lot to take, specially when one is bullied. I hit the gym to become more manly. One day, while coming back from gym, I saw one man being cornered by 4-5 people with guns and baseball bats. Usually in this situation, a person runs to their family. I have no family, no one. I don’t know why but I stepped in shouting, ” hey! Back off! ”

“Listen pretty boy, just stay out of it and you will live”, one of them growled.

This should have been enough of a warning to make me run, but I had enough of the bullies that I punched him in the stomach making him bent over in pain, kneeing his nose, I threw him on the road.

Seeing this, two of the rest attacked me. I have no idea how but I kicked their asses to hell and back. The other two just ran away.

I was proud of myself, I had won. Helping the man up, I asked him if he was fine. He said he was impressed.

This small talk became a long one in which I told him about my life, obviously leaving being homosexual. He said I am most welcomed to live with him and the others.

“Others ?”, I asked.

“Oh yes, my gang members”, was the only reply I got.

It was like a bulb went off and I realised that he is the gang leader of the east side.

The stupid and new me got excited to finally being able to live with a family. I guess family is what makes you weak but also strong.


Three years have passed since I had joined the gang. I had immediately became the bad boy of the school and slowly had gained trust of every gang member. Is it wrong that I am the most favorite gang member in the gang house ? I guess no.

All these years I had kept the secret of my sexuality and I was not going to make it ruin everything for me.


I guess everything good had to come to an end. Two years later, at twenty, I had finally came to accept who I was and I was no more scared to come open.

I was thrown out of the gang for being a homosexual. They said I was weak. They are wrong, I can beat them all in a pulp. But it’s too late, I have been abandoned once again.

Is an orphan supposed to stay an orphan forever ?


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